Sunday, April 18, 2010

Babs' Handy Guide to Internet Acronyms or BHGTIA

The internet is a culture all its own and when you enter it, you would do well to have an acronym translator. The AAAAA (American Association Against Acronym Abuse) is doing its best to discourage the ubiquitous acronym through its well-funded program, JSNTA. PWCSA (People Who Can't Stand Acronyms) are also taking donations, fearing that one day acronyms will replace words altogether. After all, why go to the trouble of uttering entire sentences full of words when everyone knows what you're talking about when you say OMGROTFLMAO?

With this handy guide, you'll get all you need to know about navigating the internet with ease and savvy. Let's start with the most common acronyms first.

LOL: Lost, Outcast, Lonely. LOL is a cry for help. When someone claims to be LOL they are usually lying, but just to make sure, you should ask them if they are okay.

BFF: Blasted Foul Fiend. User does not care for you.

FWIW: Frankly We're Infinitely Wise: Only the most arrogant and self-assured internet users will employ this acronym. Don't believe anything that begins with this egomaniacal phraseology.

TTYL: TeeTotalers, You Lose. This acronym is always followed by dead silence, presumably because its user has passed out cold. So who really loses, I ask?

WTF: Wow, That's Fantastic! This will often be used in the comments section of political blogs when you have just made a particularly astute statement.

FTW: Failure To Wean. This makes reference to men who are still afraid of their mothers.


Brenda said...

Funny stuff, Babs. LOL!

Reading this I was reminded of a NPR call-in show on this topic, during which a church pastor called in with her story of misunderstanding. She had somehow come to the conclusion that LOL meant LOVING OUR LORD, and in trying to stay current, she started using it to sign off her cards and letters -- including condolences to families after tragedy and loss. As in: Remember that in His wisdom our Father has a plan for all of us. LOL, Pastor Smith.

Someone finally had the sense to ask her what the heck she was doing, and she said she still lives in horror at the thought. Kinda funny. Or awful, not sure which.

Grannymar said...

Hi Babs, thank you for visiting my blog today. I do love your list and also Brenda's story. Now I must stop lol-ing and get back to answering comments at my place!

Adele Roy said...

LOL gets the most confusion. I know someone who uses it for Lots of Love, which, if you plant that in your mind the next time you read it, may give you an uncontrollable case of the giggles (UCOTG).

BHBK (Big Hug Big Kiss) -- Adele

Charity LaGrange said...

This is great! Acronyms as a means of communication drive me crazy. I am always trying to figure out what the other person is saying.
Maybe I'll try your method and make up my own interpretations! What fun.